We got the news yesterday morning that I would be induced Friday. So we took Jozy out to brunch and celebrated her last days as the baby and then drove around talking. That night we had a family game night to celebrate the last night together as a family of four. It was perfect and wonderful. I'm ready for our next chapter but it was nice to get to say goodbye to this one too.
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Ladybug as has the most sensitive giving heart I've ever seen. She carries pennies around to give as gifts. She looks for small ways to brighten someone's day and bless them with whatever it is she has to give. She cries at movies, even not so sad ones, but she feels so deeply into her soul. Her empathy and forgiveness amazes me. The boy who bullied her at the begining of the year has now become a friend. She is quick to defend him and help him find a better path. She is the first person to help when someone is hurt or just sad. I worry that it will be too much one day. That her level of love and emotion for people will get her hurt. It will, I know that. But I also know that God blessed her with this wonderful gift and for it she will make uniquely wonderful relationships.
I want to remember this stage of our life; where the girls are at right now. How we are as a family of four. I am so very ready to hold Button and all those wonderful moments that lie ahead of us. But I know it's important to remember the right now and really soak up life in this stage. Since I wrote Jozy last week, today is Bug's turn.
I see so much of myself in her, the good and the bad. She has my feisty attitude and wild imagination. She has my divalicious take on the world spirit, but also the uncertainty that it can hide. She tries to avoid confrontation with those she loves, but wants to be just as awesome as everyone else. It's a hard combination, the sassy and insecurity. I know the struggle and it breaks my heart when I see her go through it. However our girl, is far better at it than I was. I see her overcoming the odds and finding balance.
Her spunk and heart are so equally her. They have also helped her to become such a wonderful big sister. One that is protective, kind, loving and true. I can't imagine a more perfectly perfect big sis.
She has grown so independent this year ands is begining to crave "her" time. With her quick wit and fast learning skills, it's no wonder she needs me a little less everyday. But once in awhile, she surprises me with extra snuggles or loves. Sometimes I think it's because she knows how much I will always need her or perhaps it's because she know I will always be there with open arms.
I love you, baby girl. You are our first baby. The girl who made us parents and will always be.
Last weekend my awesome friend took some maternit pics for me! I just love how they turned out and couldn't wait to share.
Thank you again, Virgina with VLS photography.
Monday, January 12, 2015
As the time winds down and we get closer to Button's arrival; I find myself focusing more on little moments with Jozy. I am so glad we kept her home one more year and I get this extra one on one time with her. Soon she wont be the littlest but a medium sister and its so bitter sweet. It doesn't help that in a couple months we will be celebrating her 4th birthday! I'm telling you, I am no longer blinking!
I love my days with just Jozy. They are always filled with the perfect amount of relaxing and adventure. She always has the best one liners and stories. And she makes every task so much more fun. Though one of my favorite things is slipping into my bed with her at nap time. Tucking her in and singing lullabies, or chatting about life. She always reaches for my hand right before drifting off and holds it the entire time. I hope even after Button is born, I can get them on a similar schedule so this routine continues. They are magically refreshing and I crave them everyday.
This has been such a fun stage and getting to see her really come into her own the last months has been awesome. This girl is so full of spunk and sass! She is always smiling and happy to just be. I love that about her and embrace it fully. She sees the world as magical and full of little sprinkles of goodness. I am so blessed to be along for the ride.
However every now and then, she just wants to spend the day cuddling. It's as if she can read my mind and knows that Mommy needs so extra snuggles.So we curl up with books or movies. We giggle and love.
Jozy giraffe is by far the perfect amount of sass and sweet. She will always be my baby and is going to rock at being a big sister!!!! I love her so!
Monday, January 5, 2015
I spent most of Sunday at the hospital waititng to see if Button would be making her appearance. Luckily, it looks like we have another week or two of her safe and snug. The scare got me thinking about this pregnancy and how quickly the time has flown by. I can't believe we are in the "she could come any day" stage of pregnancy and that before too much longer our little family will be complete. I can't wait to hold our lil Button, but I am over the moon excited to see her with the big sisters. Ladybug and Jozy have started asking regularly if today is the day Button comes. Their excitement to meet her and love on her is pure bliss for me. Ladybug loves to cuddle into my lap and talk to Button, while Jozy just likes to give her hugs and kisses. I know our three girls will be fast friends and the love they share will be boundless.
As for me? As excited as I am to finally hold our girl and be a complete family, I am also nervous. I learned after having Jozy that my love would multiply with each child, but my time will not. How do I balance three demanding kids and schedules? How do I make sure the big girls are getting enough quality time with me while trying to keep up with all the needs a new born has? How do I make sure the girls all know they are equally and greatly loved? These are my worries.
I know with the help of my support network (Which I am eternally grateful for) I will get through. That it will take some time, patience and mistakes before we have a steady system. That I will sacrifice sleep, showers, and so much in order to give to my girls. That I also have an amazing husband/superhero, who will be there by my side to help shower our three miracles with all the love they need. So, I try not to worry too much. I try to plan and focus on little moments. I am trying to remember that I am not perfect and that's ok. That it's ok if our house isn't always in "guest ready" mode or that I opt for extra snuggles with a movie instead of an intense game of guess who. But mostly I try to remember to be thankful and how blessed we are.
There will be days that I feel like I am failing and days when everything falls into place. So as this stage of our family life is winding down and we wait for the next step, I am excited. I am ready and I am blessed!